A Beer Run: Saturday Long Run…on a treadmill.

It’s been a long while since I did this, but Saturday morning definitely qualifies for what I like to call A Beer Run, or a run that drives me to drink. (Even though I’m a wine drinker. “Beer run” just has such a better ring to it.) The more beers a run is awarded the more terrible it was.

Surprisingly the fact that I decided to do my long run on a treadmill this weekend was not what made the experience unbearable. To the contrary, the actual running part was fine and even enjoyable. It was everything that led up to it that created maximum suckitude.

It all started when I found out the temperature on Saturday morning would be around 9 degrees. I wanted to get in least 10 miles, but with all the snow and ice on the ground around here and the cold I just couldn’t convince myself to run outside. This is why I have a gym membership! I never have a good excuse to not go for a run because I can always do it inside. My nice warm gym opens at 5am. I could set my alarm for when I would usually wake up to do a 12 miler and have plenty time to drive over there, go as far as I could on the treadmill, and then head home in time for my husband to go to work. It was a perfect idea.

Except that it wasn’t.

It started out well though. My alarm went off at quarter of 6. I jumped out of bed with more energy than usual, pleased that I wouldn’t have to freeze my tail off this morning. I threw on running shorts and a tank and layered on sweats to keep me warm in the few moments I would actually have to be outside. I started my car and it dinged obnoxiously, which is the sound it makes when it’s REALLY FREAKING COLD. As promised, the temperature reading was 9 degrees. Everything was going according to plan.

I was singing along with Muse and going over my plan of attack for the treadmill – I could get in 11 miles without even worrying about my pace! – when I pulled into the gym parking lot and noticed that it seemed particularly empty. As in, I was the only one there. Would I have this whole place to myself or what?

Why yes I would because as I drew closer I saw that the lights were off. The gym wasn’t open. I pulled up to the door where the hours and displayed and yeeeeah. They open at 5am on weekdays, but on Saturday? Notsomuch. On Saturday they open at 7am. I looked at the clock. 20 after 6.


So what was I supposed to do now? I could go home, change into cold weather gear and run outside, but by the time I did all that it would probably be close to 7. Or I could sit in my car for 40 minutes fuming at the gym, at my own stupidity, at the fact that I woke up at at 5:45 am for absolutely no good reason, and at that point be lucky to squeeze in 8 miles before I had to be home.

Both of these options were lame.

I ended up choosing the second one and as I hung out in my car listening to my music and huffing and puffing to myself, more confused-looking people pulled into the lot and I could see the same reaction I just had written on their faces. At least I wasn’t the only moron in town. By the time a clearly hungover gym employee unlocked the door at 30 seconds to 7, I had been joined by about 6 other people and we stood on the front steps like a pack of frozen zombies, hungry for endorphins instead of brains.

I ran to the movie theater (which at that point was lit up and no movie was playing) anxious to get as much done as I could. About a mile and a half into my run, the lights went down and the movie started up. Rush Hour. Vom. But at that point I didn’t really care. I was going to get in 8 miles and if I had to sit through a movie with terrible Chris Tucker in it, then so be it.

About 10 minutes later something pretty cool finally happened. The movie shut off and at first I was like WTF!? NOOOOO!! GIVE ME BACK MY RUSH HOUR!! But then a new one took it’s place. The brand new Hobbit movie that is still in theaters!! Rush Hour WAS supposed to be the movie of the day, but I guess Hungover Gym Employee knew I was the only one in there and took pity on me. Maybe he is also not a Chris Tucker fan. My only regret became that I couldn’t stay on the treadmill long enough to see what happened!

I ran my 8 miles in 1:02, which is a record for me on a treadmill. I got home in time to shower and then it was all good times with my daughter. The day was saved.

Although it got off to a most icky, annoying start, a good effort and a good movie saved this run from total destruction. I award my first long run on the treadmill 3 out of 5 on the Beer-O-Meter. It might have scored a 2 of 5 if not for the waking up at 5:45 for no good reason part. Grrrrrrr.


I guess for the rest of the winter, I’ll either be sticking to 8 miles on a freezing Saturday morning or sucking it up in the cold. This weekend, I’ll just have to be cold.

Did you run this weekend? Was it cold? Do you like Rush Hour? (My apologies if you do, but I just cannot deal with Chris Tucker.)

~ Salt


24 thoughts on “A Beer Run: Saturday Long Run…on a treadmill.

  1. Mar @ Mar on the Run! says:

    LOL. I love this post. I ran 10 miles outside with temps of about 16, but I’m in a training group and had a running partner so that saved the day. My heart sank a little b/c I looove Chris Tucker!! but your description is hysterical.

    • runsaltrun says:

      I wish I had a training group! Something about going out on a solo run when it was that cold was just unappealing to me the other day. I hear this weekend we will have 30’s in the morning with maybe some rain which will be perfect. 🙂

      And I’m SORRY! Haha I want to like him and I like his face but I think it’s just his voice that grates on my nerves.

  2. txa1265 says:

    Aw – I hate it when you are so ready to go and it seems like the world is conspiring to make it NOT happen! Glad you got a long run in, even if it was ‘beer run worthy’!

    I was one of the morons out in the cold – it was 6F when I started off yesterday and got in a great 12.5 miles … it was only 9F when I got home, but it was sunny with no wind so felt pretty warm (also warmer air was coming in fast which made it feel warmer).

    • runsaltrun says:

      I knew you would be outside!! 🙂 You are going to be my inspiration for this Saturday in case I try to make another excuse about not going outside. It’s MUCH colder where you are and you always make it happen!

      • txa1265 says:

        My wife has a simple explanation – I’m an idiot! 🙂 As we prepare for -20 tonight rather than asking IF I will be running in the morning, she asks how I am preparing 🙂

  3. Kelly @ Turned up to Eleven says:

    That is awesome they changed the movie to a great one but such a tease. That thing is 3 hours long!!! But way better than Rush Hour!!! I still don’t get why a gym would be closed on the weekend until 7 am… seems silly. Glad you weren’t alone in the assumption it should be opened sooner! And glad you got a good run in to make the rest of the day better!

    • runsaltrun says:

      I would have stayed on there for 3 hours if I could! It was actually a really great time! 🙂 I’m running at the gym again today and half hoping that they decide to put that one on again. (It was Rush Hour 2 yesterday. NO NO NO.)

  4. kristenk says:

    I ran this weekend and yes, it was cold. I’m pretty jealous of your run actually, that’s how bad mine was! Mine would have been a 5 out of 5 on the Beer-O-Meter! I do feel your pain though, waiting 40 minutes in your car probably wasn’t fun at all. Congrats on staying there and getting it done though!

  5. Andrea says:

    Oh man, you get a ton of credit for not just throwing in the towel on that workout! I don’t think I’ve been on a treadmill in 2 years and I’d like to keep things that way :).

  6. ambertherunner says:

    Love your definition of a beer run- lol! I’ve definitely had some of those.
    I totally would’ve sat in my car for 40 min fuming too! It’s funny that sometimes runs don’t always change our mood around if our attitude is irritated enough to start with.

  7. Joi says:

    I totally joined a training group for this very reason. It was 8 degrees here and more icy than I’m comfortable with. There’s no way I would’ve gotten up for a solo long run. My fingers were numb and I slipped lost my cool points, but I survived.

  8. Sarah says:

    I’ve run two half marathons on the treadmill and they are the actual worst. God bless the iPad and rented iTunes movies.

    By the way – suuuuper stoked I found your blog again. I was wondering where you’ve been missy!! ❤

    • runsaltrun says:

      SARAH!! YAY!!! I’m so glad you did too! 🙂
      And yeah I have no idea what I’d do without that movie theater. As POed as I am about the late opening, the movies they show are key!

  9. Anita says:

    How cool is it that your gym has a movie theatre in it? I would love to have something like that in my gym.

    I’m with you on the Chris Tucker thing, I think the guy is an idiot.

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